publicschoolstories:

Senior year, 2k11. I’m gonna preface this with: I come from a literal cotton picking town.
We were the last class to graduate out of the old high school since it was closing down at the end of the year. Everyone knows the senior class always does one big prank to leave their mark. Our class? Nah fam. We wanted to be legends. We wanted our story told years after we left. The class president called a class meeting, so all 60 of us crammed into the Latin room and tossed around ideas. Some were good, some not really, and some were borderline crimes. How big should we go? There’s only 60 of us. Where should this happen? How long should this last?

Naturally, we chose every big idea and then decided Senior Prank Day would last five days.

Monday, we started small. We went to Hobby Lobby and bought out their supply of marbles and industrial strength glue. We cut every marble in half then waited until Sunday night to break into the school. I had the master key to the doors. Don’t ask how I got it. We glued seven marbles on the floor right where the doors close. Since they were clear marbles, you couldn’t see them. That caused mayhem.

Tuesday, we ramped it up. Half of us lived on farms. We gathered all the baby animals and unleashed them in the school early that morning. I’m talking chicks, baby goats, a kid brought a cow, ducks, some piglets and a random fucking donkey.

Wednesday, the faculty couldn’t figure out how we were managing to get into the school at night. For hump day, we went to Sam’s Club to, naturally, buy out their Saran wrap. Every faculty member’s car was wrapped. This happened in the middle of the day so their cars were hella hot when the last class let out. (I went to a high school in Texas)

Thursday, Senior Skip Day. We bought so much soap and poured it in the air vents to make bubbles. Relatively harmless. By far the least criminal thing we’ve done.

Friday, we KNEW this one would be the stuff of legend. We would graduate knowing we finally broke the assistant principal and principal (also probably criminals if we got caught). Our assistant principal drove a VW bug. One of my buddies and I suggested we move his car into the main hallway so it’ll the first thing everyone sees. We took down the divider in the double doors and pushed this man’s car into the hallway. Then we wrapped his car in layers of pads and Saran wrap. For the principal, we decided we’d confuse the entire staff. We filled her office with balloons filled with confetti, tossed glitter everywhere and tossed cans of fart spray into the air that goes to her office. We also moved her truck into the greenhouse.

The staff couldn’t ever prove we did anything. The cameras never worked. We were careful about everything. We wore gloves, tied our hair back (if we had long hair), and wore Crocs so they couldn’t tell any shoe print apart.

Seven years later, my little cousin is in high school and kids still talk about the Senior Prank of 2011. No other class has been able to top ours.